Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
cat food counts as protein by the way
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Randomize
