So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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