lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize
