Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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