He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
