I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
