Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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