Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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