i used baking grease as lip gloss
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
My boob is missing a layer of skin
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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