it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
