You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
