I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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