Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
