One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Randomize
