I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize