then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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