do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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