ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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