i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
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