Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
