Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
