I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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