you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
