3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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