Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
