New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Randomize
