Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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