Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
