I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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