I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
