So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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