I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
