i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
No subtext here. People are naked.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Randomize
