i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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