best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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