What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
