the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Randomize