Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I still have a little drunk in my system
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
