Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Randomize
