i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
