Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
