get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
