I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
