I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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