and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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