the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
My Sexting was not on an AP level
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
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