It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
the liver wants what the liver wants
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
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