fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
