he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
You made out with two different species that night
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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