I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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