I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Did I show you my penis last night?
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
